This weekend has all been about work, preparing for my work, getting the housework done, getting the work done in the garden and the poly tunnel and there has been hours of it. Nonetheless, I’m feeling really good. This blog is where I come when I feel beat up, down hearted or chewed up and spat out. It’s also where I come when I’ve had to push through and just get on with things. Today, and tonight in particular is about pushing through and coming out feeling fantastic!
I’m feeling pissed off about losing a stone in weight and then not losing any more. I’ve gone back to protein only days and upped my exercise to an hour a day, increased my water, cut out any salt and yet, the needle on the bathroom scales does not move from 12 stone 13lbs!!!! How am I coping with the disappointment? I’m just pushing through
Having been a thinnish person for most of my life, the first time I went on a ‘diet’, I lost two and a half stone and kept it off for three years! I then slipped into, what I can only look back on as a parallel universe and ate and ate and ate! It was delicious but it was also avoidance of healthy options. For two more years, I ate and knew I wanted to stop, I wanted to lose weight and kept putting it off for another day. When I booked my holiday, I knew I was imminently going to the land of the tiny, trim and skinny people, who seem to walk, cycle or run everywhere and eat portions the size of baby meals and I knew, I would feel gross in comparison!!!
Well, I did make the change and although I feel as if I’ve come to a grinding halt, the best part of this whole process has got to be exercise. How can I have missed out on this for so long??? I’ve taken fluoxetine in the past and it never made me feel as good as I feel now. The endorphin lift is incredible. Tonight, I made it to four miles and walked for well over an hour. I turned corners and headed up every hill I could find, sipped water if I got tired and just pushed through. I could feel myself walking faster, my stride lengthening and my heart pounding. I walk in time with the music and had Fleetwood Mac’s greatest hits on shuffle and I would speed up or slow down to catch my breath. I arrived home, sweaty, red faced, with my hair all over the place and I haven’t felt this good in years!
I may not be losing weight in the way I would like to, but I’m a bigger person now and I’m not going to give up. I will get there in the end but just for now, I’m enjoying every footstep, feeling great and loving the journey.